I teach my clients to effectively communicate with one another in a way that both parties feel heard and validated in the discussion. There are two sides to a conversation: the communicator and the receiver. Part of a healthy relationship is being able to play both roles effectively by using the skills and tools that I provide.
Using “I Statements”
I help my clients master the usage of “I statements” as a big tool for communication. “I statements” are especially helpful when conveying needs and feelings in a way that is sufficient and non-offensive. For example:
- Communicator: “I feel frustrated when I am not being heard or listened to.”
- Listener: “I hear and understand that you feel frustrated when you are not being heard or when I don’t acknowledge your statement.”
I teach my clients skills that not only allow them to get their message across more effectively but also encourage them to respond in a way that validates their partner and their feelings.
Steps for the listener:
- Hearing the information
- Clarifying the information
- Validating the information
Often, the most important and prevalent part of communication is the desire to feel heard. Practicing respectful dialogue, in which both parties put effort into hearing one another, is key to reintegrating healthy relationships.
“Only with steadfast memories can we now be strong so as to undo the mistakes of the past, to begin anew and build from the rubble of their betrayal.”
-F. Sionil Jose